I know every parent wants the best thing for their children and honestly there is no right or wrong way of parenting as every parenting technique is unique , every child’s needs and behaviour is different therefore parents do best for their kids depending on the situation. however i have seen many toxic parents too but assuming most of us feel our parents are best and we are blessed to have them
As per my opinion what worked out best for me is as follows:
1. On decision making:
My parents never forced their decision on me. Like I wanted to pursue my education in science stream , in spite of many people giving them suggestions that science is very difficult they stood by me and believed in me. They never expected me to score top numbers but they were always there to emotionally support me whenever i was facing difficulties
2. On handling doubts:
They always let me explore the answers of my doubts on my own. My father asked me to find the best college and then choose better options. Ideally parents what they do is they give direct answers like XYZ is the best college but they incorporate the value of taking decisions on my own rather than listening to suggestions.
3. On inculcating good habits:
I once fell into the habit of drinking. One day my father got to know about it. instead of yelling and shouting he just said that i dont force you to stop drinking but you should be responsible and set a limit for yourself. There are other important people and important things to do in life as well. You know it’s easy to give a lecture on why alcohol is bad but rarely people make you realise the consequences of it on your personality. What I mean here is, my father didn’t say stop drinking but made me realise that I should be accountable for my actions and be brave enough to face its consequences. so think about it. How cool is that?
4. On Joy of giving:
My mother always makes sure that whenever my friends come over to my place they do not leave without eating at our home or at least having a cup of tea. She used to offer tea to even servants. Now that I have started living alone, I follow the same practice and I feel immensely happy serving my guests. Sometimes I just feel like offering my help to strangers without expecting anything in return. This selflessness is priceless.
5. On gender roles:
My mother never argued with anyone but she used to raise her opinion whenever necessary . She never said let your father decide. My parents are a great team, the person better at a particular thing takes charge of it. I love it. As I have understood gender equality from them. At our home there is no particular thing called Women belonging in the kitchen. My father is a great cook and my mother is good at keeping accounts. So I could never escape performing any particular task justifying it with my gender. We perform our duties with dignity.
Many of us will not have answers for the above question now but you can think about it now as you will become a parent someday too.
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